Here is Selma Blair at the Hellboy II: The Golden Army press conference in Mexico City. If you ask me, she’s looking a little golden herself. The movie should be called The Golden Army and Brown Honey. I don’t even know why they made Hellboy 2 - the first one couldn’t even keep me awake during the first, um, one-fourth of the movie. I’d better see more explosions and Hellboy shooting everyone and everything in this one to keep me even remotely snooze-free. The movie is to be released on July 11.

Here’s more from the conference:

Ashley Tisdale was spotted on the beach celebrating July 4th holiday with her boytoy. Whoa, look at those gigantic fangs just waiting to stab somebody on their neck. Notice she’s wearing a ring on her wedding ring finger. Looks like she’s about to suck someone’s blood in order to initiate them into her vampire ring. How romantic.

Eva Mendes spent a romantic day strolling around Paris with Frodo, I mean, her boyfriend - who looks like Frodo. What is up with these good-looking celebrity females dating dudes that are far less good-looking than they are? Must be their shining personality. Not that I’m saying Eva Mendes is hot or anything. I mean, without makeup, she’s the best thing since sliced bread. But I suppose women don’t care about looks as much as men. Unlike Leonardo DiCaprio, Tom Brady, and Andy Roddick. You’ll never see those dudes dating like, say, Britney, or Eva Longoria, if she were single and non-airbrushed.

Here’s more Eva and Frodo:

Penn Badgley was spotted chilling out on the set of Gossip Girl in New York City. I hope he plans on washing that hair soon and changing that shirt. And those jeans are a little tight, aren’t they? Maybe he wants the cameras to catch his good side - like his cute little butt, perhaps?

Here’s more:

Here is the “ever so gangsta-lookin” Johnny Depp on the set of a new movie called Public Enemies to be released in 2009. Looks like he’s missing a tooth. How cool! That ought to scare people. According to IMDB: “The Feds try to take down notorious American gangsters John Dillinger, Baby Face Nelson and Pretty Boy Floyd during a booming crime wave in the 1930s.” This reminds me of Johnny’s previous gangsta movie, Blow, where he ends up in prison like a million times for dealing drugs. Oh, and guess who plays Pretty Boy Floyd? Step Up and Stop Loss’s Channing Tatum (go figure)! This movie just got hotter!

Here’s more hottie Johnny Depp:

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony were spotted shopping in Milan today. This is one of those odd and unlikely couples that makes you wanna scratch your head and go … HOW? WHY? I mean, J-Lo can probably use Marc Anthony as floss, or a walking stick, or to do a high jump with like you see in the Olympics. Or do a show and tell on what the human skeleton looks like. I bet she’ll pass with flying colors.

If you can think of more uses, feel free to let me know. Here’s more:

And you thought Faith Hill was one of the hottest women alive? Well, guess what, all those days worrying about younger girls touching her husband, Tim McGraw, while he’s performing and beating them up every time it happens has turned Faith Hill into Frumpy. She’s lucky she’s wearing those giant glasses covering up her eye wrinkles or she would’ve ended up in our Stars Without Makeup section.

Here’s Frumpy and family taking a stroll a few days ago:

Damn, what the hell happened to Courteney Cox’s face? It’s like it shrunk from an oval shape to a straight pointy V-shape, even worse than Jay Leno’s. Wow, look at the differences between these two photos. Magazine cover: Her face got airbrushed into an oval shape and her chin got chopped. In real life: not so much. Thin is beauty? Might wanna think that again.

You almost never see Christina Aguilera walk around without having her face all decked out like a combination of a clown and a clown wearing extra face paint. Actually, a very bronze clown, looking at these pictures. I remember in fifth grade I had to make a George Washington face using brown clay, cardboard, cotton, and super glue. Now that I think back, I should’ve just had Christina Aguilera show up to my class instead.